09 September 2009

Fear

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.


Fear anticipates the worst and not the best.

The what if's will drive you crazy.

Fear is stressful and accomplishes nothing.

What is accomplished by fearing the unknown?

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After visiting with Dr. Gut about placing a gastronomy tube in Liam, I have had my fears taken away. Seeing the tube, what it does and how it will look, must have been what I needed to allay my fears.

Liam is doing better on his eating and drinking now that he is 1 1/2 months into the Erythromycin. He is now downing his 5 ounce bottles, willingly, in ten minutes. And his weight is almost to 21 lbs.

I posted a question to my CP support group on what they would do if they were in my shoes and gave them Liam's stats and current info. And most of them said they would continue to hold off as long as possible. No one who had the tube regretted it, but the consensus was that if we can keep him tube free and still gaining weight then we are a giant leap ahead in this feeding game.

After the talks with other moms and because Liam's eating has been doing so well, we are currently going to hold off on the g-tube.

It is not off the table, but we have shoved it to the other side, out of reach, for a little bit longer.

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2 comments:

allie said...

I am so glad that you have been able to find peace with your decision! I can only imagine how stressful it was for you to worry if it was right or not.

23 Weekers said...

I'm happy to hear that Liam is eating better. I agree that if you can get them to eat enough to gain appropriate weight, then I wouldn't get the tube, either. Heck, Kinnick has a tube and still doesn't weigh 21 lbs. Carver only weighs 22 lbs. They do eat much better when they are more regular. So, maybe you found the wonder drug. We give Carver Miralax daily and that has made a big difference in his eating.